The Space We Take Up
a discussion on inherent privilege and how we can use it positively and negatively.
Privilege is one of those taboo topics that we all hush-whisper about. When we admit to our privileges, we also must admit that achieving an accomplishment might have been easier than it was for someone else. You tell a white man that them getting into Harvard wasn’t as hard as it could’ve been for other people because of the years of generational wealth their family accumulated and his 3rd-year legacy, and suddenly you just accused him of war crimes.
The bigger systemic privileges are systems like white supremacy, capitalism, and patriarchy. These are systems that the world is built on. Being born a man or white is something you cannot change but it gives you an inherent privilege that you didn’t ask for, but something you must live with. While you can face hardships from other circumstances, being white or being a man will not impact those hardships.
When we have systems in place to amend the wrongdoings of the past such as affirmative action, the people who do not benefit from affirmative action think that something is being taken away from them. But nothing was given to them in the first place. There was no set-in-stone writing saying that a cisgender heterosexual white male with a 4.8 GPA, 1540 SAT, and 4 extracurriculars is getting this spot in a school. So why does he think his spot is being taken away?
Because he does not recognize the privilege he has to just exist in a world that was built for him. The SAT was built to test white male intelligence. His economic privilege afforded him an SAT tutor. He was able to take AP classes because he lives in a white, affluent neighborhood with high property taxes that fund his school appropriately. His stats show his privilege. His mindset toward affirmative action shows his entitlement.
Affirmative action does not take opportunities from those who benefit from the current systems in place. It feels that way because the world tells them they deserve to have that spot. You look at the 1983 graduating class of an Ivy League school and find it consisting of mostly white men. Why wouldn’t you think you deserve to be that guy graduating from that school 40 years later? When the world has conditioned you to think of yourself as important, you think you deserve to take up that space.
Even just walking on a street shows how people with privilege take up space.
I was at a farmer’s market last weekend. I live in a white city, but it was jarring how white it was at this market. I’m not even exaggerating when I say I was the only black person and one of seven people of color in this crowd of at least 200 people.
So, I’m walking through this market, bobbing and weaving through people who are staring at me like I’m out of place. But what I was noticing was that I was the only one moving out of the way. The white people I was passing kept walking straight. I was the only one aware of the space I was taking up.
It is a privilege to never have to be aware of the space you take up. When society was built to make you flourish, there is never a doubt that you belong somewhere. For so many women of color, we are hyperaware of how we are perceived in white spaces. We don’t want to be too loud or too apparent. We want to blend in, but how can you blend in when every part of your identity is a statement against the status quo?
So, you make yourself smaller and try to take up as little space as possible to let those around you feel comfortable.
Maybe if I were more confrontational I would stop moving for people, but it is so ingrained in me that I do not have space on the sidewalk. It is ingrained that this is not my place. No matter how hard I try, it just isn’t.
And that’s not my fault. The fault lies in the people who refuse to relinquish their entitlement to space. If they recognized their privilege and decided to make room on the sidewalk, this situation wouldn’t exist.
The first step to making space for others is recognizing the privileges you have.
One privilege I have is my mom paying for my gas. I spend between $30-$40 dollars on gas every week. This economic privilege snowballs into the rest of my life. Because I don’t have to pay for gas, I don’t need a job to afford going places. Because I don’t need a job, I have time to volunteer and participate in other extracurricular activities. With those extracurriculars and volunteer opportunities, my college resume looks much better. For someone who must work to afford their gas, these opportunities are not available, or they must stretch themselves thin to complete everything.
These privileges aren’t something to ignore. My being cognitive about my economic privilege allows me to close gaps for others who may not share those advantages. My gas money goes toward picking up teammates to get to practice. Or it goes to coaching middle school basketball players. Out of something I was fortunate enough to be born with, I have positively impacted others who were not as fortunate.
What we do with our privileges for others is far more important than what our privileges gain us individually. I gave this example of gas money not to brag about how amazing I am. That was not the point. The point is that when we recognize the way we are benefited by the systems that are in place, we can make changes to actually make an equitable society. It just takes recognition and action.
But so many times when we are told we have privilege, we deflect and try to make it appear as though we’ve had it hard. We try to hide these privileges, or we complain, or even worse, we accept these privileges greedily and do not try to do something positive with them.
The space we take up does not have to interfere with the space the people next to us take up. We can all coexist in the same place without suffocating each other. But that can only happen if we decide to recognize our privileges and biases.
So many people have lived, died, and been forgotten. Less than 1% of the human population that has ever lived is written in history books. Chances are, we will not be remembered 100 years after our deaths. So, knowing this, if you choose to hoard your privilege and live your life comfortably, what legacy do you leave? What has your privilege gained you other than momentary comfortability?
This does not mean you must give up everything you have, but it does mean that giving someone else the space to be successful when they have been historically marginalized is a more valuable legacy than the legacy of your self-interest. The way we make space for others does not have to be grand, but it must be done. Privilege should not feel shameful. Privilege can be the door left open for those who do not have opportunities or advantages available to them, but this can only happen if we can put aside how privilege individually benefits us in the long run.