january's confessional is a phone in a washer machine

great way to start the year

because the universe knows i post something at the end of the month, it tends to send me something fun to talk about at the end so I don’t forget

about a week ago, i was doing laundry. i put my hamper clothes in the washer, take the pile on my bed, and put those in the washer as well. washer goes on, and i decide to make a snack because i just got home from work.

i’m about to sit down and eat when i realize i have misplaced my phone. i checked my bed, bathroom, and kitchen, but i still couldn’t find it. the most impossible and worst thing comes to my mind: i put my phone in the washer.

i check the washer but i couldn’t sort through the water and my drenched sweaters. so, like any rational person, i let the washer finish because sometimes what is done is already done.

patiently, i waited for the cycle to finish and went to unload the washer, and unfortunately, i did in fact find my phone at the bottom of the bin. fortunately, though, nothing was wrong with it. i could just use it and forget about the potential damage that i can’t see.

but yesterday, i woke up to a phone glitching to stay on. by the time i walked to class, the screen was completely green and i had no way of using it at all. obviously, everything i need is on my phone this is the 21st century after all. i struggled my way through my classes, convinced a bus driver to let me on the bus home, and then found my way to the phone repair store.

at first, they told me it would be 250 dollars to fix my phone because i was going with the cheap option, but i was later informed by my roommate, who was my line of contact with the store, that i would have to buy the 350 dollar screen instead.

anyway, i paid the $400 dollars after tax because as much as i would love to convince everyone that i could live on a flip phone, i can’t. i would die.

so i tell you this story for two reasons:

1.) i really needed to rant about how expensive the phone screen was. i just don’t understand how the service was 1/4 of the price of a new phone. even worse, it is so humbling knowing that i spent that much money for a goddamn phone screen. like i couldve bought a plane ticket for that price. could’ve gotten new headphones or something, but instead i had to pay for something that wasn’t my fault (it was completely my fault.

2.) accountability is important. i called my mom on my laptop and told her what happened. and i think my biggest red flag is that i have a history of breaking phones. i am a bit clumsy and mistakes happen, but long story short, my mom is never completely surprised when something happens to my phone. i try to tell her that i didn’t do anything to make it break and she’s like ‘fine if you didnt do anything i will pay for it”. as the honest Abe I am, i tell her “it’s fine, i’ll pay for it, there mayhaps have been some foul play”. she rolls her eyes, obviously, and she’s like ‘well this is a good life lesson then, get a better phone case and stop leaving your phone in your back pocket’. this time i’m the one to roll my eyes because i’ve heard her say that soooooo many times.

but after i got a sweet treat (honey oolong boba), wrote a review to get a free screen protector, and calmed down, i did in fact come to terms with the fact that this was an avoidable L. not to say that shit can’t happen, but dumb shit like this can definetly happen a lot less.

and maybe this is me projecting, but i do see a lot of people ask ‘why me’ or ‘i can’t catch a break, i never win’. and while I think some of the time, this is a valid way to react to the constant setbacks, I also think at some point, we gotta just keep it pushing, especially when it is our fault. not to sound like a conservative who tells people to pick themself up by their bootstrap, but also, eventually, you just have to take the L and shut up. t

he world doesn’t end with one fuck up, but the day feels a lot worse when you stew in bitterness, angry at the world for something you might have caused. yes, I am pissed that I paid that much for a phone screen, however, it has been a day, and I am over it. because no matter how long i stay mad, it won’t put the money back in my pockets.

so, beloved reader, i write this to hold myself accountable for the things i can control. to absorb the blame, rather than forfeit it. to be disciplined enough to stop the problem from happening in the first place.

consider this a leaf turned over.

merry February!